Lives Change, Paths Cross

People come into our lives because they are used by God as instruments of change. It is the challenge that change brings into our lives that tests the fortitude of our character - our faith (in God, in ourselves and in other people), core values (honesty, integrity, courage, generosity, compassion), our spiritual grip towards Godliness.

In the light of uncertainty, we always find ourselves wondering if some people are worth expressing our emotions to. At home, kids would most often test our patience by deliberately doing the "DO NOTs". During the old days (here I go again hahaha), my parents would simply widen their eyes and if it got really bad, ask us to lay on our stomach for the proverbial butt battering (that is, after lecturing you while your naked butt awaits in suspense). My parents disciplined all of us, 8 kids, the old fashioned way but until this day, I believe it is still the most effective. I think that physical punishment, as long as its far and few in between (and as long as it is limited to just spanking, NOT beating up) is a very effective way of showing kids that wrongdoings = pain. And yes, later as they live their own lives they would look back with gratitude that they just got spanks in the butt rather than get into bigger and deeper troubles that could cost them their whole lives because they were not properly raised. Teaching kids the strong sense of right and wrong is very critical. Growing up disciplined teaches you to love yourself (and other people) the right way. And as kids grow, the manner of disciplining them has to change too. A parent who does not recognize the constant change he/she has to cope with while raising children will end up frustrated and hated by his/her kids. Children raise us as much as we raise them. They stretch our understanding, broaden our capability to accept, teach us to be creative in influencing them towards the learnings we want to impart and repeatedly strengthen our faith in the courage and love they bring out from us.

In the same way, there are people who suddenly appear in our lives and somehow leave a strong mark in us. I remember a manager I worked with who strongly influenced me about sincerity. She was one person who seemed not to run out of good things to think of, whether about people or situations. But what's different about her is that she made it a point to keep her good acts secret. She always quoted that biblical verse about not letting the right hand know what the left hand is doing. She said genuine acts of goodness are those that nobody else knows; otherwise, you are doing it for self-gratification. She was my best example of the attitude of being happy about making others happy. Another person I couldn't forget is an office mate who taught me how to pray by heart. Born and raised Catholic, praying never touched my soul the way it did after this lady sat down with me one time and "walked through" the rosary with me. She said, some people criticize us for repeating prayers like the rosary but then if every time you recite the prayers, you feel it in your heart, then it stops becoming a mechanical act. It is like saying "I Love You" everyday to a loved one. Does it mean that when you repeatedly say it, you don't mean it? "Pray like you mean it or else, don't pray at all."

At the end of each day, do we look back and recall the people whom we crossed paths with and who somehow changed our lives? Do we change lives ourselves and how?